Walking, Memories, and Regular Life

Today I am not giving you any big messages, just a few verbal “snapshots” from my day.
Although it is still sweltering hot and humid here, this morning there was a bit of a breeze, and I felt like walking. And the main reason is because I had a place I wanted to see. On Sunday, I had walked to the farthest extension of the main street next to my house, a 5 kilometer round trip walk. But later I had looked at the map, and I suddenly realized that I had come to within about 4 blocks of the place I had rented when I was a new immigrant here in Israel, some 36 years ago (early winter 1974). I decided on Sunday that within the week I would meander over to “ HaBiluim street” in Ramat Gan (a suburb of Tel Aviv). This morning I had the time, energy, and desire to carry that resolution out.
So armed with TWO bottles of ice water, a hanky to wipe the pouring sweat with, and a bus card just in case I discovered “on the way” that the trip was too hot/exhausting, I embarked. [I also grabbed my cellphone so my husband could phone me when he discovered that I had been missing for too long (in lieu of contacting the police)…… LOL] On reaching the start of “HaBiluim” street, I recognized NOTHING except for a single large building that had existed in that area 36 years ago. The entire area had been built up, modernized, and several parks had been added. (Back in 1974, there were numerous unbuilt lots in the area.) However, on reaching the far end of the street, where I had lived, I discovered that the two-story house still was there, albeit with renovations.
It is strange revisiting a place where you once lived. I felt a connection to the place (even though it had only been a half-year rental), and it brought back several memories.

* * * *
What memories? Here are a few:
1) One morning we awoke to the sound of the mooing of a cow. Amazingly, somehow, a cow had strolled over from somewhere to our front lawn. Mind you, we were living in the middle of the Tel Aviv metropolis, and one building from the freeway…..No, I do NOT know how it got there……
2) How we (I rented together with two other young women) were invited to share a Passover seder with a family in the neighborhood. And when I had tried to buy Challah bread for the shabbas before Passover (which unknown to me at that time, needed to be ordered well in advance, as it was too close to the breadless holiday), the (non-religious) store owner looked at me like I was absolutely crazy, and asked if I really thought that he had no fear of G-d.
3) How I used to walk many Saturday afternoons from our house to the “national park” about twenty minutes away. I remember posing there (on a weekday) for a picture on a rock, pleased at the weight I had lost not too long before. And I purchased nearby my first cream for athelete’s foot…. And that makes me pause and wonder at the capacity of the human brain to remember……
* * * *
(Back to the Present)
Once I had reached Biluim street, I decided to make the extra 15 minute push over to the national park. (Many women from my town ride there to walk on its straight and scenic sidewalks. I doubt that many walk TO the park!) However, on my arrival, I decided that it was too hot to walk on the many unshaded parts of the paths around the park, so after snapping a few photos, I started my return trek to home, hoping that I wouldn’t regret it halfway there. And thankfully, the walk back was actually pretty easy.


PS Later in the morning I took Ricki shopping for some blouses, and she behaved very well, accepting my more emphatic “no’s”…. However,I also caught her throwing chicken bones from lunch on the floor again this afternoon. She is currently picking them up. SHE doesn't know it, but after I get off the computer, she is going to have a half-hour moratorium from the computer as a punishment.]

The Dire Threat

A few days ago, Ricki saw her older sister cooking two fried eggs for herself, and decided that “If she can, I can.” Explanations that her married sister’s repast was unhealthy fell on deaf ears, as did our insistence that Ricki limit herself to a single portion of egg.
Yesterday morning she again consumed two eggs, and I sat her down for a serious talk. She seemed to begin to understand.
Fast-forward to the evening hours. I had not prepared soup, as I often do; it was simply too hot; and I settled for a bowl of cereal for supper. Ricki has not yet been willing to even TRY cereal, and wanted an egg. I refused, and to enforce the statement, I discretely closed the gas main to the stove. On discovering that I had somehow tampered with the stove, she fiercely uttered her dire threat:
“Tomorrow morning I will NOT have an egg, because you wouldn’t let me now! I will NOT!!!”
I confess my sins. I burst out in laughter. (“The devil made me do it…”*) When Ricki asked why I was laughing, I lied and said that I was thinking of something.. What else could I claim????

*the Smothers brothers

The Unexpected.....

An Unexpected Update....
I am updating on the hearing aide campaign. Unexpectedly, Ricki is suddenly not interested enough in borekas to wear her hearing aid, and my turning the disc player off (because it is too LOUD) hasn't helped either. So either she is in a "I'm the boss and I will do as I like mood, OR I will have to rethink tactics. I will wait a day or two to see how things develop.....
The Unexpected Blossom
About ten weeks ago I purchased several plants to have around the house, adding some beauty and green. Of the three, one promptly died (I have the opposite of a green thumb….), but the remaining two have survived. On is a riot of tiny red flowers, the other is a non-flowering lovely purplish-green leafy plant. Or so I thought. Suddenly today I noticed that the leafy plant was sporting a blossom, one that was totally unexpected. A pure gift, given gratis.
[image: Plant with blossom (and in the background Ricki’s old stuffed teddy bear stuck into her nephew’s unused car seat….)]


Sometimes life sends us surprises. Some appear to be good ones, and others “bad”. We may be only slightly surprised, we may be shocked. Part of maturity is learning that we are not always the one “calling the shots”, and learning to roll with the tide and waves that engulf us.
And sometimes we get a simple unexpected gift.
Do you have any that you would like to share?

The Ocean

Yesterday Ricki and I went to the ocean. We jumped in the waves and had a grand time! While there, we ran into the "aide" that she had in kindergarden at age six. She was then an unmarried twenty; now she is a mother of FIVE! Heavens, how time flies!

“Superwoman” and the (Negative) Power of Criticism

Lately I have been feeling a bit like a “superwoman” who would like to be a bit less perfect, or at least under less pressure. Two people in my life have been rather unhelpful, yet feel comfortable dishing out suggestions, criticisms, and pointing out in general all the things that are wrong in our house/town/country. There is almost no way to cook for the family in a way that will please both; last week I made two separate menus for Shabbas morning in an effort to please both. The week before I made two separate batches of Challah (homemade bread). It would have been nice to receive a compliment or thank-you, but neither was forthcoming.
In addition to keeping Ricki occupied during the vacation, I have to put up with all sorts of “helpful” hints about how various things need attending to. And if I dare suggest that said person could “pitch in” a bit more, or if I protest the criticism, all I get is more verbal abuse as a result, or denial of the blatant reality that this person barely lifts a finger to help.
I am getting a bit fed up with all this, but at least I am trying not to take it to heart. These persons have their own reasons why they speak the way they do; apparently better behavior is beyond them at this point.
What this does show me is the tremendous negative effect of constant, even well-intentioned negative comments. [And I realize that unfortunately I have not been perfect in this matter myself.] Recurrent faultfinding (even if meant for the good) begins to grate on one’s soul after a while.
What keeps me afloat is the wonderfully positive upbringing I had, the knowledge that my parents, especially my Mom, valued me for what I was. The positive self esteem that I received years ago is what helps me, even today, to see that the problem of the subtly negative people surrounding me is a problem of THEIR own personality’s manufacturing.

On Eyeglasses and Hearing Aids (Special exposure Wednesday)

[image: Ricki coloring, without her glasses, and obviously having trouble seeing the page.]

A week and a half ago Ricki lost her eyeglasses again. This is already not “news”, as the new pair we ordered will be the third pair in a two-month period. When she was in school, she was apparently being influenced by a friend but now that Ricki is home on vacation, she readily wears her glasses. (We actually found the second pair after we had ordered the third. The third pair has now been stashed away in my closet for the next “incident”……)
But there’s even something better. I have been making a “campaign” for Ricki to wear her HEARING AID, each day that she wears them earns her the “ultimate” prize (“borekas” potato puff pastry). And the campaign is working; she has been wearing the aid every day, and is even apparently coming to realize that she has been missing out a lot by not wearing them. I am hoping that she becomes acclimated enough to them over vacation that she will REALLY want to wear them. It will take a real leap of courage to send her to school with them. I can not afford 3 sets of hearing aids the way I purchased eyeglasses…….
More of "special Exposure Wednesday" can be found HERE.

The Play

I took Ricki to a theatrical performance last night (taking her was easier than finding a sitter), and she enjoyed the play , although the story was WAY over her head. Most importantly, she behaved excellently.
The play was about a woman with postpartum depression, and although the subject DOES need more publicity in our community, I felt that the story was misleading in some ways. Worst of all, the woman gets miraculously better when a social worker is called to investigate her suitability as a parent. Note that she makes instant recovery, under pressure, with out medication, treatment , or help. Now that is NOT very realistic, is it?

On a Positive Note

Today I was thinking that I have really been letting my readers down. My writing as late has not been up to par, and I simply “grab” whatever negative things Ricki has done that day, and plop it on the cyber-page of the blog.
And that’s not rally fair, not to you, and not to Ricki. Because there are a lot of positive things that Ricki does, that I take for granted, and never get noted here. And that really gives you a rather negative and one-sided view of what Ricki is like. So I am bli neder (without promising) going to try and change that. And I will start right now.
Yesterday afternoon Ricki and I went shopping. And those of you who are veteran readers know that shopping with Ricki used to be akin to entering a combat zone (well, not quite!).
Ricki requested several items over the course of the hour and a half that we were out. Some I purchased; most I refused. And with a disgruntled sigh, she accepted my vetos. She was interested all along about which store we wer5e going to next, and would ask me more than once if the answer was not clear to her.
In the end, as we reached the bottom of the building, I told Ricki that I was going to take an hour’s walk, and could she please take all the purchases upstairs and let herself in with the key?
Yes, she could, would, and did.

Which Season????

When I first noticed Ricki wearing winter clothing in the summer, I assumed hat it was due to the lower number of buttoned on the blouse, making getting dressed all that easier.
So I made it “jolly well clear” that she did not have to be so lazy as to wear winter pullovers in the summer heat, and she could button the summer blouses….
So now I am trying to figure out this incident from Friday. I entered the living room, to find Ricki ensconced in her winter gloves and a woolen hat. I told her to remove them.
Then, maybe an hour later, I see her again, this time in her swimsuit. I had NO idea why should would be doing this, but she was listening to a tape, and it seemed as if she was trying to stage some type of performance.
I DO wish I knew what was going on……

SOOC Saurday/ Sunday

[image: another sunrise photo]

Have a nice day everyone!
[You will find more of SOOC HERE.]

Losing Battle…..

This morning when I awoke, I heard rummaging around in the kitchen, and went to investigate. I discovered Ricki stuffing miniature soy cutlets onto a plate (the equivalent of about 3 full portions). I intervened, confiscating the contraband, and urging her to get dressed, etc., before even CONSIDERING eating.
So a half hour later I enter the kitchen to find her with 4 slices of brad, and a fried egg. Two slices were on the plate with the egg, and the other two she was lathering with chocolate spread. When I queried her about why she had taken such a huge amount of bread, she answered in a tone which made it clear that to her it was obvious: “two slices to eat with the egg, and two slices to have with chocolate”.
I suspect I am fighting a losing battle (but I am not giving up yet….)………..

Shabbas Walking

Usually on shabbas, I DO walk (pre-counted walking "paths"), but a bit slower than normal and I don't push myself if I feel I am getting tired.
This last shabbas, I ran into a friend who sheepishly started telling me that Rav Feinstein said that someone who enjoys "walking" is allowed to on shabbas, and so she does down the street and back (about a fifth of what I have been doing as of late). I laughed, showed her my water bottle, and said "Why in the world do you think I am out so early in the morning????"

A Hard Lesson, Hopefully Learned

Ricki (like many teens) doesn't particularly like to deal with her bra. She can put it on, but like full-button down blouses, she tends to lose patience with it, and tries to get away with not putting it on. I try to remember to check in the morning if she actually DID don one by running a finger down her back. Yesterday morning she protested, saying “You can’t touch me.” And she is right, so I didn’t. But I warned her that if she hadn’t put her bra on, she must do so. Incidentally, she went several times to her room in the ensuing half hour, changing blouses until she found one that she wanted to wear.
Fast forward two hours. We had gone downstairs, and where leaving to go to the supermarket. Suddenly I noticed that her blouse’s buttons were done up crookedly (wrong button to wrong buttonhole), and I indicated to Ricki that I wanted to fix them. She agreed, but as I was fixing them, I realized that she was braless.
To make a long story short, I sent Ricki home to put on a bra, and as I was running late, I went ahead without taking her. (I also went without her because I felt she needed to learn that when I say something, I MEAN it.)
So she didn’t listen, and she lost out. It was a hard lesson for her (she had really wanted to go). I hope it was a lesson learned.

“I’m Fasting…”

Yesterday morning as I entered the living room, Ricki announced to me proudly “I’m fasting…” But as I walked into the kitchen, I noticed several rice cake crumbs on the floor. So as Ricki continued, , saying “I didn’t eat anything…”, I knew that she was not being totally honest. That she said “I’m fasting” was OK, as at that moment, she WAS. But the lie that she had not eaten before, disturbed me, and I told her so. So she sheepishly simply said “Now I am fasting..” And I said, “Yes, Now you are.” Again, as two years previously, her perception of what everyone is doing is an overwhelming shaper of her behavior..

Service dog video /Ricki's Tishe B'Av Fast

If you haven't seen this video (Service Dog to SURFice dog), click on it to go to You Tube. It is great.
Mind you, this does not mean that we do not TRY to help our kids with special needs succeed "normally". What they can do, we will help them learn. But in the end, we need to be satisfied with what results.

For example, I wrote two years ago (the Tishe B'av post mentioned yesterday)how Ricki fasted much of the day. This year, Ricki was adament that come morning, she WOULD NOT FAST. And I was OK with this. But after a few rice cakes today, she fasted the entire day until about an hour before the end of the fast. Now Ricki's sister, seeing everything in the "ALL OR NOTHING" light, rather disregarded Ricki's accomplishment. But I witnessesed how she was struggling already three hours before the fast 's end, and think that she deserves REAL CREDIT for making the effort. Who says that she has to be 100% ????????

Blog Closed Tishe B'Av Fast Today-Links

In liew of a post today, I am posting a few links to pertinent previous posts that you may not have yet read.

Two and a half years ago, it was thought (later shown to be not sure) that someone with Down syndrome had been used by terrorists as a bomber. In liew of similar news this week, HERE is my post on that topic.

A post-Tishe B'Av post from two years ago on fasting/dieting is HERE.
(PS This was posted with a time lapse, in advance.)

The Tortoise and the Hare

For a long period we have been dealing with certain negative behaviors of Ricki. I have tried behavior modification plans, rewards, and punishments, to little avail. But I reevaluated everything, and felt that the plan I had in place was correct, and should theoretically work. I suspected that it was simply a matter of waiting for Ricki to slowly absorb the knowledge that correct behavior was in her best interests. Finally yesterday I saw some progress.
We live in a world where we expect a quick cure, a fast fix, and it just always doesn’t work like that. Sometimes things simply take time. Give it time… and don’t give up!

The Shnitzl Story

Things you need to know to understand this post:
1. Shnitzl is the Hebrew tern for fried chicken cutlets
2. The first nine days of the Jewish month of AV are days of mourning over the destruction (almost 2000 years ago) of the second temple, culminating in the fast of Tishe B'Av.These nine days are called "the nine days". (This year Tishe B'Av falls on Monday night to sunset Tuesday.)During the nine days, one does not eat meat, except on Shabbas (sunset Friday to sundown Saturday).
3. I usually do not have any cooked meat in my freezer. I do not cook in bulk, generally, and use up leftovers in a day or two.
* * *
Before the nine days I considered carefully what type of meals I would cook for the two Sabbaths which would fall in the nine days. Not wanting leftovers (which could not be eaten during the week) I finally decided for the shabbas that fefl a week ago to cook beef, and for this last weekend to make shnitzl. Everyone in the family loves shnitzl, but I prepare it rarely, due to the high caloric count that it has. I knew that with shnitzl there would be no leftovers.
A week ago, there were some leftovers after shabbas, so grudgingly I froze them.
Friday night this week we had baked chicken, which, since I made slightly small portions, got finished without problems. The shnitzl for the morning meal was in the back of the fridge, hidden from the eyes of my teenage sons.
In the morning, I was carefull not to put the shnitzl to warm up too early. I was afraid that if I did, Ricki might swipe some, and we would be a bit short. So finally at 10:30 am I went to the fridge, in order to extract the meat.
It was gone.
5 out of 6 portions had disappeared, explaining the crumbs i had noticed that morning on the counter top. Ricki had polished off nearly the entire amount.
Amazingly, I had that frozen meat from last week to fall back on, although Ricki got a real earfull from everyone who had been anticipating a rare treat.

And of course all that fried food did nothing good for Ricki's digestive system, but I think it better to stop here.....

End of the Year

Ricki finished school for this year today. So finally I was able to empty her schoolbag of ALLSORTS of junk. Although she protested: "I have to show it to _____"(a friend)[mind you, she's taken some items nearly every day for a year for that reason...]I kept reminding her that there is no school tomarrow.
I think that next year I will make a list of what goes into the schoolbag, allowing ONE unessential item only. Wish me luck!

The Downside of Routines

I mentioned yesterday the pluses of routine. Today I want to touch some of the downsides of them.
First, having a set routine can be stagnating and boring. Even the best walking track gets boring if done absolutely the same way day after day, and even a two-week "diet paln" can leave one feeling after a while that one is not living a "normal" life. But worse than that, if a routine becomes so important that it is unbreakable and unflexible, we have become prisoners in a jail of our own making. When asked to do a favor for someone which infringes on our regular routines, we may often be tempted to refuse without even really considering if the request is feasible.Perhaps we could, with minor adjustmants to our schuedules, accept the opportunity to help another, but servitude to our "routine" my cancel our logical thinking. (In extreeme cases, this can be downright dangerous.)
We need to be able to alter our routines when change is called for (as I did by sleeping in on Tuesday), while keeping in mind that regularly-done tasks may be more difficult when not done in their regular way. (If I had given myself an extra incentive, or perk, for walking, I probably would have done so despite the novel I was devouring.But I underestimated my evil inclination....)
* * * * *
It is well-known that children, teens, and adults with Down syndrome often have "scripts", or "grooves" : routines that they will keep, almost no-matter-what. These routines give the person with intellectual disability the security of knowing what is expected of them, what they need to do, and what comes next. It is definately worthwhile to occaisionally purposely alter the standard schuedule of the day, starting from when your child is young, in order to teach them possibility of flexibility.

Routine- It can be a Big Plus!

I have a routine set -up for most of my days:
-Walking in the morning
-Getting Ricki ready for school
-Prayers,breakfast, normal straightening of the house
-housework/errands/ other things that need doing/ make lunch
-Nap
-late lunch
-time with Ricki/housework/ make soup for supper (most days)
-supper
-computer time

Of course, there is a lot more, and many variations. But in general, there is a certain set-up to my day.

However on Monday night after returning home at G-d-knows-what-hour from Jerusalem,and feeling extra tired (ie, EXHAUSTED) due to the pain the bus ride had entailed, I decided that:
1) Ricki could go late to school the next morning
2) I would "sleep in", and do my walking on Tuesday in the evening. (On arising it would be too hot already...)

Well, my intentions were good. And I really did need that sleep. But I was hungry as could be in the morning (exercise reduces appitite, except for swimming), and although I stuck to my diet, it was difficult.
But the real problem was that when afternoon arrived, I decided to finish a book that I have been reading (effectively postponing housework, as I felt exhausted from the heat wave we were having). And when sundown arrived (and the time to "make up" my morning walk), the book won out over walking for over an hour.
Routines usually develop because they WORK. Having a set pattern eliminates wondering what to do next, and helps us tackle those chores you may not enjoy. [If cleaning the toilet is a regular "have-to-do-it job" for Sundays, Tuesdays, and Thursdays, you are not likely to skip it, even if you can't stand to do it...]
And for those of us with children with intelectual disability, routine is an effective way to help that person learn and know what needs to be done, and what is expected of them. And they also will find unenjoyable chores more palatable is that is "the way things are done".

[G-d willing, the downside of Routines tomarrow]

Computer Troubles

My computer is down. I DO have acess to my son's computer, but it is not 100% either.
Add to that the fact that I have been terribly busy, and you have a situation where I may be posting less than usual.

A Rant and a Hug

First the rant. I had a terrible/wonderful day yesterday. I went to Jerusalem yesterday with Ricki, to visit two of my sons, and their families. THAT was great. BUT… I discovered within a few minutes of sitting on the bus, that my leg muscles are still VERY sore from a week ago.
You see, last Tuesday I went rafting with a group of women on the Jordan river. I was excited to try this, it being a commonly-done sport here which I never had tried. One of my sons warned me that “It’s not for you, not yet”, but I innocently thought “What in the world can happen? I know how to swim. So my arm muscles will be a bit sore for a day afterwards….” So I dreamed……..
I and my partner, T., were amongst the first to set out. Later we heard from others that when they got stuck in the shallows, there was staff there to help them. Well, we didn’t see that staff, and we had to exert ourselves very hard several times to get unstuck. And amazingly, my arm muscles did not hurt that much afterwards. But my leg muscles have been in extreme pain, from sitting on the floor of the boat for two hours. For a whole WEEK! Yesterday I thought that they were better, but the bus ride each way today was uniformly painful.
Then to top it off, I wanted to treat two of my grandsons with a trip to the Kotel (wailing wall) and we got there to discover a demonstration in progress. We were stuck almost there for an hour, and in the end were forced to return without actually going to the holy site.
End of rant….
* * * *
On the bus coming, Ricki noticed me almost in tears from the pain… and reached over to hug me. She made my day…..

Beneath the Wings (a Poem)

[image: potter] I wrote this poem over a year ago, about something that was going on in my life. But I think that it is appliciable to the feelings one could have with any "test" we find difficult.











BENEATH THE WINGS
G-d, please shelter me,
Comfort this heart,
Be as a wall around me

My life is torn asunder
The dream is dead
Yet I stand
I survive.

The Hope is gone
A cataclysmic hole
In my soul.

I have none but You
To hold me
Beneath Your wings,
To heal me,
And soothe
This battered being,
In a world gone crazy.

My life has cascaded down,
Like a house of cards
Strewn in the cyclone’s winds…
And only You are constant,
Only You, Beneath Your wings.


For in Your shadow
A soothing stream of Love
Cocoon around my soul,
Wrapping the ache and searing pain
And tho’ I never will be whole again
I turn to You G-d
To support my stand
To enable me to fly…..
For I roost
Beneath Your wings,
Caressed by the soothing hand
And even a sometimes hardened hand…

The firm grip of the potter
Fashioning my life, my being


But His is a grip
That will never desert me.

His hands shaping the clay
Of my existence
Day by Day
Even if I do not see it,
Beneath the Wings

[PS The image of a potter is not my idea. It comes from the litergy of the high holy days.]

KOSHER COOKING CARNIVAL - Number 56!

KOSHER COOKING CARNIVAL - Number 56! The Nine Days Are Here Again!

A “carnival” is like an online magazine, with blog articles on a certain topic grouped together. This is the 56th (!!) issue of KCC- the Kosher Cooking Carnival, managed by Batya. It is not only recipes, but anything connected with the Kosher Kitchen: kashrut in Jewish law, reviews of kosher restaurants and cookbooks, Shabbat and holiday menus, and kosher recipes.

WHO IS EATING KOSHER?
Everyone, including my non-Jewish readers, may find the following usefull: Batya presents Eating Kosher, Much More Than Hot Dogs posted at me-ander.
You will find more on Dairy-free eating and kosher foods HERE.

SHORT KOSHER-NEWS ITEMS:
Yisrael Medad presents Factoid - Munch On It posted at My Right Word.

Chabad World Headquarters presents Local Chabad Center Leads Challah Baking Workshop for Deaf posted at lubavitch.com Chabad-Lubavitch news site.

Yisrael Medad presents Man, Oh Manna posted at My Right Word.

Batya notes the ironic two-sidedness of countries outlawing shechita in Cruelty to Animals, Shechita (Jewish Animal Slaughter) and Hunting posted at Shiloh Musings.

Soon the wedding halls will be running full steam, after the nine days, and in an important article, Jerusalem Kosher News talks about “kosher” events that are catered, sometimes without full supervision.


BREAKFAST FOODS:
Where I come from, blueberry muffins are breakfast foods, so this is where I am listing G6’s presentation of Food Photo Friday - The Season's Bounty posted at Guess Who's Coming To Dinner. (BTW, this can be Milky or Pareve.)

SIDE DISHES
Yisrael Medad presents The Americanization of Hummus posted at My Right Word. Believers in pure hummus are in for a shock……(As he noted in the “Carnival comments”: “OMG. Look what is happening to hummus.”)

Batya presents Colorful Salad Recipe sans Picture posted at me-ander, which sounds delicious. You don’t have to be on a diet to enjoy this!

MAIN DISHES
Suitable for the Nine days, Mottel presents Gourmet Mottel: A Dinner posted at Letters of Thought.

Batya presents an interesting use for leftover celery root in More Ways to Use Celeriac posted at me-ander.

I was reminded of my Russian-speaking ulpan roommate by Mirjam Weiss’s story of ulpan roommates.; She presents in addition a chicken recipe in Age Old Friends posted at Miriyummy.

Perfect for the nine days, Mirjam Weiss presents A Fishy Story in Two Parts posted at Miriyummy.



TRADITIONAL FOOD- SHMALTZ (This artery-clogging concoction belongs in a category of its own )
Mirjam Weiss presents Shmaltz - The Sequel posted at Miriyummy.


DESERTS
A story of “adoption” along with (at the bottom of the post) a butterscotch cheesecake recipe is presented by Miriyummy Dulce Dog Days of Summer posted at Miriyummy. She also gives us a honey muffin recipe; see Oh Didi Honey posted at Miriyummy.

For anyone feeling the summer heat, Gloria Kobrin presents Simple Apricot Sorbet--No Ice Cream Maker Needed!! posted at Kosher Cookbook App.

Anyone looking for cake, birthdaycake or not, need look no further than Mrs. S., who presents Birthday cake, as nature intended it posted at Our Shiputzim: A Work In Progress.


G6 presents (looks delectable, but not for my diet!) Food Photo Friday - Streuselkuchen (German Crumb Cake) posted at Guess Who's Coming To Dinner.

For those with a sweet tooth, Mirjam Weiss presents Lambs to the Daughter posted at Miriyummy.

MISC
Chana Rubin, a registered Diatician, talks about reducing the salt in our diet.


And last (but not least, Rickimom (that’s me) writes about some kitchen gadgets.

That concludes this edition. Thank you to Batya for managing the Kosher Cooking Carnival.. Offer to host an upcoming carnival by contacting Batya. Submit your blog article to the next edition of kosher cooking carnival-kcc using our carnival submission form. Past editions can be found on our blog carnival index page.

SOOC- Tiberias

[image: Line of Palm trees along street in Tiberias.]

I decided to finally post some pictures from my trip last week. Our hotel was about midway up a tall hill, not far from where this picture was taken.
















[Image: Early morning sunlight on the Sea of Galilee.]

The first morning there I took a walk down to the shore of the Sea of Galilee, and back up to the hotel.









[image: view of part of the Sea of Galilee, and the surrounding countryside, from hillside in Tiberias:]





The next day I walked up from my hotel to where I took the following picture, and then down again. So I effectivly walked to this height from the seashore (and back) over the two mornings.... It is actually not that much of a walk, but in the not-so-early morning, it was hot, so the walk seemed longer.

Cooking Gadgets

A few months ago I passed by a branch of COOKSTORE, and intrigued at the name, went in. What I discovered was a plethora of every type of cooking pot, appliance, and gadget that can be imagined. The items are good quality, but expensive. The temptation to buy items you may not really need is great. But I did find a few items that I felt were worth the investment.
[image: cooking supplies]

The three items I purchased were:
1) A nifty plastic cup and cover for microwaving an egg (shelled). In seconds you have a perfect soft-boiled egg; perfect for hectic busy mornings
2) A spray bottle for oil. I originally bought this for Passover, as there is no oil spray with a certification for Passover that I use. But in the end, I kept it for the entire year, for spraying olive oil on salads, fish, etc. To get enough pressure to spray you have to “pump” it a bit; it is not as convenient as the commercial sprays. However, if you (or someone who is your guest) uses only certain chechshers (kashrut supervision), this can be a G-dsend. And long term, can result in saving money as well.
[image: salad]

3) The third item was a nifty “fine Julianne” peeler. Using it is rather labor-intensive, so it is not practical for large amounts of vegetables, but if you want a bit of thin carrot strips to liven up your salad, using this peeler sure beats having to drag out the food processor!

Pigtails and Kerchiefs

The other day Ricki came home from school wearing a paper kerchief- the type one would expect as an accessory to a school performance of four year olds. Just as in the case of the balloon and streamers last October I felt that the outfit was entirely inappropriate, and certainly not for the street. Since for the summer program there is a different (younger) teacher, who had not yet heard my diatribe on teens with Down syndrome NOT being little girls, I went to the school to calmly yet emphatically voice my objections.
Then this morning, Ricki asked me to braid her hair into 2 “pigtails”. Here in Israel this type of hair style is rarely worn by teens, it is considered “babyish”. So I tried to convince Ricki that it was not all that appropriate, but she insisted anyway. In the end, I acquiesced, as SOME teens do wear braids.
All of this leads to the question of how much do you enforce your opinion on a child with intellectual disabilities, in the name of education, and how much do you “let it go”, because they need to make their own choices. I would be interested in your opinions.

Kosher Cooking Carnival

The Kosher Cooking Carnival is a monthly blog carnival (sort of like an online "magazine"), which is posted around Rosh Chodesh, the beginning of each Jewish month.
It covers:

Kashrut in Jewish Law
Jewish Food traditions
kosher recipes
anecdotes about Jewish Food
Jewish Holiday Food
kosher restaurants and cookbook reviews
anything kosher!

This is a reminder to send in posts! Submit HERE.

And those readers who are not Jewish will also find some good cooking ideas here next Monday (hopefully).

Sorry About Tuesday

I have been away for a few days in Tiberias. I will post photos, hopefully, in a few days. (As well as my experiances rafting in the Jordan river!) But here are two small vignettes for now, quickly, before I go to sleep:
I took my morning walk today (I pretty much kept my exercise/diet requimes while vacationing), and I saw an adult pushing/pulling a teenager with some type of disability (I suspect autism) onto a school bus. It was a bit disheartening; I would like to see better methods used. But then, barely twenty steps further, I was pleased to see a young adult (age 18? 21?)with Down syndrome sitting at a bus stop, backpack on, obviously managing very well on his own.

I Don’t Have Alzheimer’s Yet- Part Two

I wrote Friday Morning’s Post (see HERE) on Thursday morning. Later, I discovered the missing box, torn open and ruined, but contents intact, on the laundry porch. It was easy to conclude that Ricki, having seen the box on my closet shelf, and a picture of a camera on the box, had taken it, and on discovering that it did NOT contain a camera, had discarded it. “Well, at least I don’t have Alzheimer’s yet…” I comforted myself. So, now that I had the battery recharger in hand, I went to fetch the battery from my camera.
Imagine my horror when I realized that Ricki had also tampered with my camera, breaking off the battery cover, and then (when the camera stopped working) had quietly returned the camera to its place. The only hope was that a small metal piece remained, and if I could find what had fallen off, perhaps it could be fixed. After searching the area where the cameras are kept, and where I had found the box, I was still empty-handed. So I asked myself “Where would Ricki take photographs?” The answer was the living room, so I searched there, found the small metal piece, and (thank heavens!) was able to piece it all together.
And, by the way, if you tell me that you have a "normal" child who wrecks destruction, gets into your makeup, etc., it is not the same. Usually this "normal" child is a toddler, or maybe a five or six year old. It is not your teenager (who IF he is chutzpadik enough to take something without permission, will usually at least not break it), who can reach your high shelves. My husband always says "So put it out of her reach." But if I have to put everything so high that I have to go climbing to reach it, how practical is that?

Happy Birthday, America!

Do those of us who are American really appreciate the rights that we have? The freedom of the press, the right to disagree with the government, the ability to be a bit different than everyone else, and still be part of a pluristic society?
Look at the world around us? There is no shortage of countries with theocratic dictatorships, evil and ruthless overlords, and life-sapping poverty.
HOWEVER… I also see America as becoming very much a consumer-oriented society, an environment steeped in the desire to “have it all”. And I am sorry, but the resources we have are not enough for everyone to live like a monarch.
Maybe the time has come (and actually the time came already quite a while ago…) for us to be willing to do with a bit less. And to stretch ourselves a bit for the betterment of our society.

What can YOU and I do practically… some small thing… to help those whose lives are not as fortunate as yours and mine???

Facing Myself

Some of you may wonder why I never appear in any of the pictures here. And, actually, why almost no one besides Ricki does. The main reason is (as regards others), most of my family value their privacy, and do not want their pictures up on the net. For me, although that is the main reason, my feelings about being overweight have also played a part.
But then, one early morning about a week ago, I was feeling good about the way I look, and I found a creative yet modest way to capture myself on film: [image: my shadow on a stone wall.]
Than, tonight, while looking at other entries to SOOC, I came across the "Facing Myself" challenge( see HERE), and decided to join.

SOOC- Greenery

[image: blossoms] These flowers are next to a nather old and delapidated building. Someone really cared to show that they wanted the house to look nicer.

You'll find more of SOOC HERE.













[images: leaf]


















And NOT SOOC (straight out of camera is this reworking of the photo

The 45 minute “Toss and Turn”

Last night, I was working on the computer, giving out points for those who had succeeded in losing weight over the last month-plus of a weight-loss competition I had initiated on Walker Tracker. (See my sidebar.) At the same time, my internet connection was poor, and kept conking out on me, so it took longer than I had expected. So I went to sleep a bit late.
However, I had planned to get up at about five AM, in order to get out by 5:15 for an early morning (cooler) walk. In the end, I decided to do so anyway, and to plan to take a nap at about 1 or 2 in the afternoon.
So this morning I was out with the early morning birds (I hear a cackle of them in a certain tree which I pass each morning….), and returned in time to get Ricki ready for school. [On my return, my husband, for once realizing that I had been out walking for over an hour (usually he sleeps at this time), asked if I am trying out for the Olympics next.] After getting Ricki out to her bus, it was 7:20, and I sat down to say my morning prayers. Suddenly tiredness swept over me like a steamroller.
At this point, I had two choices (at least). Either I could continue the day as planned, fighting that urge to eat or drink something sweet in order to get that “energy high” that I am so used to, OR… I could listen to my body, and take a nap RIGHT AWAY. I opted for the second. And while I lay down for only 45 minutes, and not an hour, and it was more of a “toss and turn” than a nap, I DID have my feet up and my eyes closed. And what about all those things I needed to get done? Well, after those 45 minutes, I was rested enough to tackle them much more energetically and efficiently.

A Suitable Place

Alternate Title: I Don’t Have Alzheimer’s Yet- Part One
Several months ago I purchased a good camera for myself. This was before Passover, when I was busy, so I stuck the box with all the accessories onto a bookshelf in the living room. Weeks passed, and finally I found a suitable place to store the box.

Now I just wish that I could remember what and where that “suitable place” is……
Does this ever happen to you?

Oh, Really….

[image: the beach]

Today the girls from Ricki’s school are going to the ocean. We are near the Mediterranean, and I, for one, am glad that she can go to the beach without me taking her. (I probably will take her myself a few times later in the summer.) Last night we carefully packed her bag, and this morning she got dressed with alacrity.
As she was leaving, I couldn’t squash that mother-hen instinct, and I told her “Ricki, be sure to listen to your teachers….”
Her reply was the same as any teenagers:
“Oh, really…” with a big sigh and a roll of her eyes.

Special Exposure Wednesday- Babysitting

[image: Ricki feeding her nephew a baby bottle]
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You will find more of "special exposure Wednesday HERE.

The Drink/Umbrella

Today as Ricki was waiting for her ride to school, she started walking back towards the house. Afraid that she would miss her car, I asked what she wanted. I heard her answer “a drink”. I exasperatedly asked her what in the world was wrong, as she HAD a two-liter bottle. After several repetitions, I realized that she was saying that she wanted an UMBRELLA. (The words “drink” and “umbrella” rhyme in Hebrew.)
“But Ricki, its SUMMER, and you don’t NEED an umbrella.”
“Oh…”, and she returned to the corner.

Sometimes we think we are hearing others, and know what they want. It isn’t always so…..

The New Eyeglasses- Steps to Independence

[image: Ricki thinking "I did it myself...]

I was supposed to pick up Ricki’s new eyeglasses yesterday morning, but they were not ready. Having gotten up early to walk, I took a good nap in the afternoon, and overslept a bit. I woke up about an hour before I needed to leave for a meeting I was attending in the evening. As I got up, Ricki came to my room (she is always careful NOT to WAKE me…). She enthusiastically informed me that the “eyeglasses store” had called to inform us that Ricki’s glasses had arrived.
-“Umm, Ricki, I really don’t think that I have time to get them now.”

Pause. I could see on her face that she REALLY wanted the glasses today. She needs them. But Ricki, after only about a half-second said “So I’ll go by myself to get them!”

And why not? Ricki has an excellent sense of direction, and having been at the store twice, I had few doubts that she could locate it. And the purchase had been paid for already.
So I warned her to cross the street with someone (after all, she WASN’T wearing her glasses), and to return straight away. And she did.

The Drink

Yesterday mid-day until the middle of the evening, we had no flowing water. A pipe had burst on shabbas, and unable to fix it then, we had turned off the main water line to the apartment, in order to stop the geyser erupting from the sink in my older daughter’s bedroom.
We caller a plumber on Saturday evening, who came within an hour, did his work, collected his fee, and left. The “Problem” was solved.
While all this was happening, I was busy finishing a novel I had started to read LAST Saturday. [I was able to excuse my not "diving" into post-shabbas work (like washing dishes and doing some laundry)because there was NO WATER. (GRIN. Anything to be able to read.....)] So Ricki went about fixing her school bag for today without any encumbrance from me.
Apparently (or at least such I suspect), Ricki, deciding that there was no water in the pipes, went off to the service porch to take a bottle of soda. There she happened on a glass mug owned by her brother, which contained a can of drink, and she requisitioned it in the name of thirsty students with Down syndrome.
Late last night, I noticed that my pen-bag was missing, and went straight to Ricki’s school bag to see if they had been pilfered by my dear daughter. There I discovered the drink, and Ricki’s older brother (the one who is in the army, and who is older than the owner of the can),smiled and said “That is Y____’s decorative jug.” Then he quipped: “I would have LOVED to see Ricki’s teacher’s expression when she would see Ricki extracting ONE LITER OF BEER from her bag!”
I have to admit, so would I…….

SOOC - my excuse for no aerobic steps yesterday

[images: sunlight streaming from behind clouds]


Yesterday I took my camera along for my early-morning walk. The result: No aerobic steps recorded. IE, I must have stopped at least once every 10 minutes to snap a shot. But the first one here, I think, was worth it.
You'll find more of SOOC HERE.

Never Blasé

No, this is NOT about texting and driving. (Although, as an aside, a sign said: “If you want to meet G-d, just text-message while driving….”)
By profession I am a nurse, although I have not worked in the field for years. But recently my step daughter graduated nursing school, and has started working as a nurse. (I am very proud of her.)
One day recently, she worked a night sift, and in the early morning, on finishing her shift, she text-messaged me that 2 of her patients had died the previous evening. She apparently felt the need to share that angst with someone who knows the feeling.
Now I was not working as a nurse for that long to have experienced many deaths on my shift. But I do remember each time. And I remember the “hit-the wall-while–running-full-speed” feeling that knocks the air out of you when a death is unexpected.
And I also remember several years ago, when every victim of a terrorist attack was mourned over, and haunted us for the remainder of the day. Today I suspect that this occurs to a lesser degree. The battering of our hearts with the media, and the need to be able to function, have taken their tool.
So I text-messaged my step-daughter back, hoping that death never becomes blasé for her….

The Bossy Classmate

Of course, one of the problems with special education is that the other students ALSO have an intellectual disability, and this sometimes creates problems. A case in point:
After quizzing Ricki several times, it appears that a girl in her class has been telling Ricki NOT to wear her glasses. This girl is very bossy, and it is hard for girls to resist her opinion. So Ricki stuffs them into her overly-packed school bag. No wonder they break so often. Only good point: this girl is old enough that next year she will not be in Ricki’s class…..
But I now REALLY have to talk to the teacher……

PS This morning Ricki asked "NU.....???" (a yiddish expression), and asked when her glasses will be ready.I told her that they would be ready (hopefully) on Sunday. "I see you need them. But will you WEAR them at school?"
-"Maybe"
-"You know, S_____ (the bossy girl) is NOT your mother!
-(bashfull smile)

Oh, What an Expensive Vacation!

Ricki came home Tuesday afternoon, bursting with excitement from her day plus away from home. She did however, whisper in my ear: “I missed you. I missed you a lot.”
The only downside was the expense. Her suitcase came back torn (she claimed that a classmate did it accidentally), and her glasses were gone. Yeah, her week-and-a-half old glasses. So all in all, it worked out to be a rather expensive day and a half…..

Special Exposure Wednesday- Golden Oldie #5

[picture: Ricki singing in the graduation from kindergarden.]



Here in Israel, the regular schools are drawing to a close, repleate with all sorts of end-of-the-year celebrations. This reminds me of years ago, when Ricki finished kindergarden. Her teacher that year gave her TWO parts in the production, saying "let her shine at what she is good at."
[image: Ricki puting a prop in place during the production, perfectly.]


At that time, integration was still pretty new in kindergardens, and most of the parents were amazed at Ricki's abilities to participate. What they didn't know was Ricki was already half-way to reading already!

You will find more of special-expose Wednesday HERE

Ricki’s Vacation

Yesterday and today, most of the girls in Ricki’s class are on a school-sponsored “get away” of a day and a half. She was very excited about the trip, and helped me pack for the time she would be gone. She is growing up. She didn’t even phone to say “Good night”, which I suspect means that she was (is) having a darned good time.
And here at home? Well, yesterday evening was pleasantly quiet- no arguments, no watching the bread (that she not take six slices). But we missed her anyway…..

The Phone Bill and the Disappearing Discount

Here in Israel, parents who have a child with “100% disability” can usually get a small discount on their phone bill. We have gotten this, but suddenly this phone bill, I noticed that the discount was missing. An inventory of the last few bills showed that it had been stopped about half a year ago.
I understand that they need to make sure that we still need it, but I would have liked to have been warned/consulted/informed. But I guess that is asking too much…..

Losing Weight Is FUN!

Lots of time you can hear dieters bemoaning the fact that it is a “life sentence”. And yes, it CAN be hard at times. But I want to remind you that losing weight, in big increments, at least, is FUN!
I went earlier tonight to a wedding* and danced. And danced. And danced. And didn’t get out of breath. It was FUN.
And since I am now used to small portions, I took a small portion of side dishes, and a normal one of meat, and I DID NOT FEEL DEPRIVED. And I didn’t even WANT more!

*For those wondering, after yesterday’s (Sunday's) post: The more comfortable dress was also hot. So I wore the flattering one (and NOT a comfortable one that is way too big). Thank G-d the air conditioning worked…..

The Sprint

[BTW, Friday’s post on the eyeglasses has an update for anyone who is following the “saga”.]
This morning I went out walking later than usual, having stayed up to all sorts of unreasonable hours last night. [This often happens on Saturday nights, as I sleep more than usual on Shabbas (Friday evening and Saturday day).] In addition, I was in demand as a babysitter, so I had to be home by 8:15, which meant that I only would have time for a twenty-minute aerobic walk. I was comforted by the knowledge that I am going to a wedding this evening, and will be able to up my step-count by dancing.
However, a shorter walk, later in the day, meant that my best walking path would cross a major thoroughfare, and I would have to stop for the traffic light, or walk in circles until it changed. But that is OK, I do it regularly. However, as I approached the intersection, from a slight distance I could see the way in which the traffic was flowing, and knew that in a few moments the pedestrian light would be green. So I started running. The light changed, and I continued my sprint, crossing the street in time. This is the longest sprint I have made in 40 years. And it felt easy. And I didn’t feel like an elephant.
You know, that feels GOOD!
Also, as a postscript to my post of 2½ weeks ago I am happy to say that an hour’s walk is now the same as a 45 minute one used to be, although part of that may be because I am walking at earlier (cooler) hours.
In short, progress is sweet!

Now my only problem is to decide whether to wear a flattering dress that I had saved from years ago (which I can just now fit into again), but which is a bit too hot for this weather, or a more lightweight outfit that is so-so. Pride and vanity, or practicality????? I’ll have to choose…..

SOOC- Nature Scenes

[image: view of coast from a high hill.]

This is another picture from last week's trip. (See HERE) One can see the coast in the distance, but I should have set my focus on that, and not on the bark, which I was using as a "frame". Too bad.

And here is a better shot, from my daily walk: [image: close up of flower.]

You will find more of SOOC HERE.

The Eyeglasses, Continued

After several days wearing her new eyeglasses (see last Wednesday’s post), Ricki suddenly decided yesterday morning not to wear them. I didn’t make a fuss about it, and when she came home from school yesterday, she put them on right away. So I assumed that after a morning without glasses, she realized that she REALLY does need them.
Wrong. She went to school this morning WITHOUT the eyewear. I will have to ask the teacher if a classmate is criticizing the glasses, or ???????

UPDATE SATURDAY NIGHT.- RICKI'S LENSE FELL OUT OF THE FRAMES FRIDAY, AND I ONLY FIXED THEM TONIGHT, BY WHICH TIME RICKI wanted THE GLASSES. IF SHE REFUSES THEM TOMARROW MORNING (SHE HAS SCHOOL ON SUNDAYS), I WILL KNOW THAT IT IS A "SCHOOL" PROBLEM......

Update Sunday Morning: She Happily wore her glasses to school this morning.....So what happened Friday morning, I don't know. I Guess I will have to chalk it up to teenager contrariness......

“I Won’t Steal Anymore”

Most of us don’t like changes in our routines, and neither does Ricki. In addition, if the situation is a new one, it can be the source of a lot of stress for her. So I was not surprised when Ricki promptly threw herself in my arms for a hug as she returned home yesterday.
You see, there was a massive demonstration today, near her school. Traffic had been blocked off, and Ricki’s driver had a lot of trouble ferrying everyone home today.
After she calmed down a bit, she told us that there had been a “demonstration”, and that the police had showed up at her school. Then she added in a whisper:”I won’t steal anynmore…”
No wonder she was petrified!

Makeup and Cosmetics

Yesterday Ricki got into my makeup. It is not the first time that she has experimented with cosmetics. (See HERE and HERE.)
I saw her hiding something behind her back, a sure indication that she is up to some type of forbidden mischief. As she saw me approaching, she realized that her time with the “goods” was VERY limited, so she quickly extracted some eye shadow from the bag and swiped a purple swatch across her neck, and then would have applied it to her mouth, but by then I had, in a rather strong-arm way, intervened. She grumbled, as usual during any spat with me, that I was being “cheeky and insolent”. [Our sages say that “He who disparages another, defames with his OWN defect.” Oh, how true!]
Later in ther evening, she had been listening to a tape and was in a better mood. She asked me to turn on the computer for her, and I agreed, with the provision that she first clean up her room. [ie., pick up the books she has thrown behind her bed, the junk between her bed and the computer table, and the dirty laundry from the floor.] As she was attacking the mess, she came across the set of creams and body-care products that I had bought her over half a year ago for her birthday.
(See HERE.)
Suddenly, the creams (which much to my disappointment, had hardly been touched since their acquisition) looked VERY interesting to Ricki. She was examining them one by one, and looking at an instruction page I had written for her at the time of their purchase. I hesitantly approached her and asked “Do you want me to explain to you how to use them?” And she actually agreed to listen. For once in a long time we had a lovely mother-daughter moment. Gee, maybe she WILL eventually grow out of the “teens”!

Special Exposure Wednesday- The Exercise "Dance"

[2 images of Ricki "dancing"]



Ricki was in a real good mood the other evening, and while "dancing" did all sorts of pushups and exercises.
You'll find more of "special exposure Wednesday" HERE.

The Hike

Today I climbed up to a cave on this hill- as difficult as any of the hiking I did in the Rockies' but at least I wasn't out of breath! (Altitude difference....)
I gave myself credit for 1000 extra steps, since most of the hike involved pauses to gauge footing placement, waiting for the woman in front, etc., and short start-and-stops don't register on my pedometer, but I definately MADE those steps!
Unfortunately, the cave we were hiking to was a real disappointment (maybe there were stalagtites further inside, but our guide didn't take us there....). The group I was with was of women my age, and I was able to keep pace with most of them, and better than many. Unfortunately, this trail was NOT appropriate for many of the women, who really had a tough time.
As we reached the parking lot, I saw a bunch of teens in some type of pre-army program, and some were groaning at the idea of scaling the hill. I piped up: "If I can do it, you can!", and I got a rosing roand of applause in return (LOL)!

The Laundry, and the Teen

Another aspect of what I posted about yesterday is that Ricki is eager to do things that make her feel grown up. Paramount seems to be hanging up laundry, or taking it in.
Whenever Ricki notices that there is laundry to be hung up, she will do so. And, if she sees laundry already hanging up, she will bring it in (even if it is not completely dry…). One day last week I had to hang up some laundry to dry three times, because Ricki kept “bringing it in”. But there HAS been progress. Ricki used to invariably chuck out the clothespins as she removed the washing from the line. But last week I threatened that I would confiscate her walkman if any more clothespins disappeared. Since then, she hasn’t tossed any out.
So can anyone explain why I had to threaten her? Why in the world were my explanations not enough?????

Try So Hard to Play for Her “Audience”

We all, on the whole, care about what others think of us, and sometimes do things because we know that others will see what we are doing.
Ricki, in this respect, is no different from the rest of us. She wants people to approve of her, especially if they are important people in her life (like her classmates and teacher).
Thus Ricki will often go to great trouble in the evening to prepare her 10:00 snack for the next school day. Invariably, this will consist of salad, fruit, and a yogurt. Ricki will banter about how healthy the food is, and how her classmates will approve. However the next morning she will invariably pack into her school bag (in addition to the “health snack”) a chocolate-spread sandwich. Then, at day’s end, the fruit and salads will be returned, in a rather inedible state. Thus it seems that for Ricki, like for many of us, the emotional side wins out over common sense in the end. Apparently she can kid herself about her “healthy” snack, and satisfy her stomach all at once……

I Found What to Post About

Last night I was wondering what to post about. One of my sons had been here with his family over shabbas (the Jewish Sabbath- Friday afternoon-to Saturday Night). And last week my daughter and her husband had returned to temporarily live in the room on our roof. So we all had a busy and enjoyable weekend. But all this does not necessarily make a post interesting enough for anyone outside of the immediate family.
One thing I thought about mentioning was that on Friday night, Ricki joined me (rather than saying “No, I am too tired…”) as I accompanied my son and his family back to the residence they had borrowed to sleep at. (They “swapped” apartments with a friend.) And in the end, Ricki was energetic the entire 40 minute walk. How? Simple. We let HER push the baby carriage (and she did an excellent job, as well).
But the real “Yes, that is what I will blog about” came late Saturday evening. I had delayed clearing the table in order to catch up on some computer activities (in the way of a good procrastinator….), and on exiting the room at eleven PM, I discovered that the table had been cleared, in its entirety. And that was NOT a small job.
Ricki, my check-stealing, throwing-glasses-in-the-trash-teen, had, unasked, seen a job that needed doing, and DID it.

SOOC- The Eye is Better Than a Camera!

[2 images of a street in the early morning light.]


These two photos showed me this week how inadequate the camera is at catching real life.
One morning as I was walking EARLY (sunrise time)(in order to beat the heat) I took these two photos at different parts of my walk. In real life, I could see the street, but the sky had a special "sunrise glow". With regular settings, I caught the "glow", but the street looks black. With special low-light settings, I caught the street, but the "glow" is gone........

You can find more of SOOC (Straight out of the camera) HERE

The Missing Check

A few days ago I took out my checkbook, and discovered, to my horror, that a check was missing. I had written the previous check just the evening before, and suspected that maybe I had accidentally torn out two checks instead on just one. However, as I was reaching for the phone, to cancel the check, I had an idea. I checked Ricki’s school bag, and sure enough, there it was, along with my bus pass and health insurance card.
I was NOT very pleased……….

Coriander and Parsley Condiment

For once, I am making a departure from the normal, and am sharing a recipe with you.

Ingredients:
-one bunch (about half of a “chaslat”-bag) of Fresh Coriander (“Kusbarah”) (about 50 grams BEFORE stems are cut)
-one bunch of fresh Parsley(about 50 grams BEFORE stems are cut)
-juice of 1 lemon
-1-2 T.olive oil,
-1 tomato
-Salt and pepper to taste

Preparation:
1) Wash fresh greens thoughly
2) cut each bunch of fresh greens just below the leaves, saving the leafy part and discarding the lower stems
3) blend all ingredients except salt and pepper in a blender
4) add salt and pepper to taste

This condiment is especially good with techina, but I also enjoy it on bread and cheese, or along with fish or chiken.

The Eyeglasses- Special Exposure Wednesday

[image: Ricki getting her eyes examined.]


About a month ago, Ricki had left her glasses on the floor, several times, until the inevitable happened: someone stepped on them. At least the lenses stayed intact, so I only had to replace the frames. Than, a few days later, Ricki threw the glasses into the trash. Unfortunately she neglected to inform me of this for about 24 hours, by which time the expensive eyewear was well on its way to a landfill.
So I decided that first off, Ricki needed to have her eyes checked. I assumed that her prescription had perhaps changed, and the “wrongness” was bothering her. Secondly, I waited a week. I let Ricki experience for a week what life is like without glasses.By the end of seven days, she DEFINITELY wanted her glasses. In the end, her prescription stayed the same. I can only assume that perhaps they felt “hot” (sweat accumulating under them….).
You can find more of "special exposure Wednesday" HERE

An Easy “Mitzvah”

A “mitzvah” (literally: commandment) is a good deed. And I garnered a very easy one yesterday…..
Yestreday morning I decided that I have to switch my morning walk to an earlier hour. Until now I have been walking after Ricki leaves for school, thus leaving the house at 7:30-ish. Yesterday I tried walking BEFORE Ricki awakened, leaving the house before 5:30. The difference in the heat and humidity was significant, and I am going to try and accommodate this change into a differently-arranged daily schedule.
Anyway, since I felt GOOD while walking, I was going at a pretty good (for me) clip. But as I “whizzed” by a street cleaner, I said a strong “Shalom” (hello). I saw him raise his head in surprise, and smile.
One word.
So easy.

So easy to help someone start the day off a bit nicer…..

Least You Think That All is Perfect in OZ after Friday’s Post

Oh, Ricki is SO much like any other teen: as unstable and unpredictable as flowing water. Today we went to pick up a new pair of eyeglasses for her, and on the way home I stopped at a store with her. When I refused to purchase more that one item for her, she became very angry. She called me “inconsiderate, and stalked home.
TEENS!

SOOC - Falling Blossums

[image: tree trunk with blossum around it.]

I noticed this tree when I was out walking early last Saturday morning. In our town the streets are closed to traffic most of Saturday (except for emergency vehicles), so there was a lush, undisturbed circle "disk" of fallen blossoms around the tree. However, I don't use a camera on Saturdays, and the scene Sunday morning was a bit less impressive.....

You can find more of SOOC (Straight Outr Of the Camers HERE.

A Different Shopping Expedition

Yesterday I went shopping with Ricki. Her shabbas skirt had several holes, and her reserve skirt is not enough for the day plus of “shabbas”(Friday evening and Saturday until dark, the “sabbath”). So we searched through the stores for something that looked nice, and we found, at a reasonable price. But best of all, is that Ricki BEHAVED. Anyone who has read my posts from two years ago (like THIS and THIS)knows that Ricki generally was NOT a well-behaved child on shopping trips. But yesterday she listened to me, accepted my decision not to buy her a drink (she HAD one in her bag), and didn’t argue with me no end about various things. After buying the skirt, I bought her a watch, and a pair of shoes, which had not been part of my original plan.
Coming home, as we climbed the stairs, Ricki turned to me and said , “Thanks Mom for going shopping with me and buying me this stuff.” I was VERY VERY pleased!

The Umbilical Cord Revisited

This is an added insight to my previous post HERE.
This week, when Ricki and I were returning from her dance class, she walked ahead of me, always checking to be sure that I was following. Her hair was unkempt, and I asked her to tie it back with a band, but she refused. When we reached close enough to home that I KNEW that she could arrive on her own with no problems, I found a place and sat down. Within moments Ricki appeared, questioning me, and insisting that we continue. I explained that I had no intention of walking with her as long as she looked like a Medussa.
She balked, hemmed, and hawed, and finally gave in. We walked home together. Well, almost together. Miss “independent” was five steps ahead.

The Negative Reaction Trap….

About two weeks ago I found that I had gotten locked into a battle of wills with Ricki. Her behavior was becoming increasingly obnoxious, and I was often slipping into the “band-aid” approach of simply reacting negatively.
[As parents, many of us slip from time to time into a sort of “automatic” mode, where one’s interaction with one’s child can escalate to a seemingly never-ending scenario of misbehavior, punishment from the parents, and resulting anger (causing further misdeeds) on part of the child.]
Finally it got to the point that I realized that things could not continue on in this manner, so I sat down to draw up an intervention plan. I made a very basicprize system where Ricki can earn up to about 25 “stars” a day, which can be redeemed for presents on Tuesday afternoon when the star store is open. So far it has been working very well, and not only is life easier for me, but Ricki herself seems to be relieved that she is in a calmer, less angry mode.

Special Exposure Wednesday- The Stars

[image: "points" sheet, play stars, and "star" box]

For about a week I have been giving Ricki "stars" for good behavior, and yesterday I got out the stash of prizes that could be purchased with them. Later in the day, she was a bit digruntled when I told her that the "star store" is open only once a week. More on this, G-d willing, tomarrow.

[image: Ricki with star box, not terribly happy....]


You'll find more of "special exposure Wednesday HERE.

For Once I Understand My Husband (a bit)

I have been urging my husband to get out and do at least a little bit of walking, for the sake of his health. He lives a VERY seditary life, and the inactivity tells on him. The problem is that he, like most non-walkers, sees walking as this HUGE hurdle to overcome. When your feet hurt, and knees ache, it is hard to believe that getting out and pounding the pavement will make you feel better. And I have been reassuring him (and any other non-walkers who care to listen), that walking is invigorating, and enjoyable. And that is the way I felt until this week.
Up until the middle of last week, I have been walking about 7000-8000 steps daily, usually from a 45 minute walk plus my daily activities. Now I am trying to get in at least 10,000 steps daily, and to do that, my daily walk needs to be extended to about 75 minutes. I thought that it wouldn’t be much harder. I was wrong.
On a 45 minute walk, I can usually work it that the harder part is in the beginning, or the middle, with no big hills in the last 15 minutes. I can’t do that with the 75 minute treck. And, frankly, after 45 minutes I feel completely worn out….
However, I am (without promising) going to give it a month’s try. I am hoping that I will acclimate to the increase. Do any of you have experience in upping activity levels and how long it takes to adjust?

The Moral of the Story

Yesterday I had gotten a bit less than my minimal amount of sleep. I had planned a nap into my schedule, but on coming home from ceramics, I was late and there was a lot to do. So, in order to have time in the evening to do some housework, and to exercise, I skipped my midday nap. I quickly made lunch, as well as a pot of soup for supper. Thus I would be free in the evening to fold the laundry and do another needs-to-get-done-already task.
So what happened? I was too tired in the evening to do anything.
Moral of the story: take care of your body, because if you don’t, it just won’t cooperate……