I had tried all week to watch what I ate, but was not 100%. I wanted to walk extra to "make up" the extra calories, but I was VERY stern in calculating any slip-ups. The end result was that even extra walking on Wednesday and Thursday was not enough. So I hit the pavement early on Friday morning, and figured that I could get out again in the evening if needed. It WAS needed (if I want to lose a full kilo this week), but felt unwilling to do so, not Friday night, and not Saturday. I didn't even do my regular Sat. AM walk, but took a REAL vacation. I felt a bit fed up with walking, watching every bite, etc. Maybe I felt that I just wouldn’t walk enough to loose a full kilo this week, and felt bad enough about that to “give up”.
This scares me a bit. Actually, it scares me a lot. If it continues, it is the way back to weighing a whopping 150 kilos. And that is something I DO NOT want.
However, I was careful about not overeating, and I feel confident that tomorrow I will be out walking as regular, and yes, watching every bite. I think I just needed a (slight) break. But that “vacation” means that I may not loose this week. (I am pretty confident that I will not gain. I WAS pretty good.) However, the bigger damage is the weakening of the feeling that I will do what I need to lose, no matter if I am in the mood or not. I really need to keep that feeling that weight loss is one of my priorities. I need to remember WHY I am doing this, and the loss if I do not continue. But I WILL continue. I am NOT stopping now. OK, I had a weak two days, but I am not going to let that mild slip-up become an avalanche. NO WAY!
It happens to all of us. Are you aware of the latest research that it's important to "go off" the diet once a week or your metabolism slows down? A friend who is a retired endocronologist says it's true.
So I "go off" on ahabbas- I allow myself an extra 500 calories. But THIS was something else, entirely...
Baruch HaShem (Thank-G-d) I got back on track since Sunday. I find it easier to forgive myself for slip-ups because I am able to limit them, and they are rare, and my general dirrection is OK. But knowing how I once gained back 35 kilos after losing (15 years ago), I want to be sure to keep those slip-ups contained and rare. Again, it all has to do with "honesty checks" ( http://beneaththewings.blogspot.com/2009/11/motivation.html )
Post of November 11, if you can't copy the URL
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