Thursday, April 21, 2011

Rule Number One: Admitting That We Have No Control….

The First Step in the “twelve steps” is admitting that we are out of control.

Before Passover, knowing full well the family “custom” to (over)eat chocolate during the pre-Pesach (pre-Passover) days and during the holiday itself, I bought several bars of the finest Swiss type with trepidation. I knew that these bars of “instant energy” were a potential diet bombshell, especially as I was running at that time on about 4 hours of sleep nightly.
The question was, why should I buy at all?
Well, Orthodox Jews take seriously the command not to eat leaven over the holiday (unfortunately the command to guard one’s health seems less critical at this juncture), and the types of food available with a really good kosher certification (for Passover) are somewhat limited. (Especially for those who also do not consume legumes over the week.) I wanted to have good treats to give the grandchildren, and my husband might very well see non-purchase of an essential like chocolate to be grounds (almost) for divorce…..
So I ate some before Passover, and although I was eating much less than once, it was surely enough to cause a dent in my plans not to gain over the month. I realized that sleep-deprivation and stress were factors in play, and consoled myself that once the holiday entered, these factors would fall by the wayside, and I would be able to get my eating under control. After all, salads and vegetable soups are great Passover foods, not just matzah with butter.
So the holiday has started, I have returned to having time for aerobic walking, and I discovered to my horror, that my consumption of fattening foods has stayed out of control.
Finally last night I admitted to myself step number one: I am powerless over the Swiss bars. So I passed them on to someone else to distribute to the grandchildren.
This does not mean that I am perfectly in control already. The lack of many of my regular diet “substitutions” has still made dieting this week very difficult, but I am beginning to get a semblance of normal intake.
BTW, I am able to withstand the cooking chocolate OK. It is only the special Passover Swiss luxuries I am unable to resist. At least I won’t have them around AFTER the holiday. But I am well aware that the failure to properly exercise my mental “SAY NO” muscle is dangerous, and I must tread VERY carefully in the weeks ahead (this week too) in order to prevent a backsliding to those pre-diet days when overeating just seemed uncontrollable. I must relearn to say “NO!”.

1 comment:

mikimi said...

But isn't chocolate a mainstay of a diet?
What about pareve chocolate-or is that also demonic for you?
Best of luck getting back on track. I know you can do it!