Thursday, July 8, 2010

Pigtails and Kerchiefs

The other day Ricki came home from school wearing a paper kerchief- the type one would expect as an accessory to a school performance of four year olds. Just as in the case of the balloon and streamers last October I felt that the outfit was entirely inappropriate, and certainly not for the street. Since for the summer program there is a different (younger) teacher, who had not yet heard my diatribe on teens with Down syndrome NOT being little girls, I went to the school to calmly yet emphatically voice my objections.
Then this morning, Ricki asked me to braid her hair into 2 “pigtails”. Here in Israel this type of hair style is rarely worn by teens, it is considered “babyish”. So I tried to convince Ricki that it was not all that appropriate, but she insisted anyway. In the end, I acquiesced, as SOME teens do wear braids.
All of this leads to the question of how much do you enforce your opinion on a child with intellectual disabilities, in the name of education, and how much do you “let it go”, because they need to make their own choices. I would be interested in your opinions.


Adelaide Dupont said...

In the name of whose education?

rickismom said...

For her education, to help her learn societal norms.

mikimi said...

If R wore a cukoo on top of her head (as a tree) as in little boys b/f the chalaka, I would agree. However I do not feel that having pigtails are necessarily babyish. And as in various previous posts of yours to do with nicknames,my name being Mikimi, I have one friend who calls me Mikimis ans a few friends in their late fifties call me Mikimi'le.
I am not DS or intellectually impaired (although some of my friends might disagree).I have an adult friend, Rachel whom /i call ra when talking with her privately (on the phone).
So I guess it is all relative to the situation.