Temorary Insanity????

Even after losing 75 kilos, I need to stay constantly on guard. 
   Lately I have been walking a bit less, and also eating more. (I can blame that on the "shavuous" holiday, but I just used the holiday as an excuse to over-indulge in my favorite food, cheesecake...)
    I need to face the fact that I am making unhealthy choices, which, if continued, will lead to weight gain. For the last two weeks I have been choosing to ignore what I know to be true, to ignore my need to put limits and draw the line.
     Tonight I am simply facing the truth of what I am choosing, and where I want to be 10 years from now.

    Dang....I will KEEP that excess weight off. NNNOOO WWWAAAYYY am I going back to the life I had before losing. NO FOOD is worth that!! Not even cheesecake.

   So back to the grind... which really isn't a grind. I ENJOY being healthy, I enjoy exercise. I won't even miss that cheesecake if I say "No" to myself. 

    I just wish that I could figure out WHY I let "holidays" be an excuse for TWO weeks instead of 2 days. Temporary insanity???

Postscript: Actually, the fact that I have been exercising less, and sleeping less in probably a significant factor in my over-extending my holiday "allowance". It all ties in together. Keeping good habits encourages other good habits as well.....

"Mother's Day" and Ricki (and the rest of my kids, even more!!)

[image: another mosaic on Ricki's grave, this time a bird (who flew away....).]

 Originally, I planned to visit Ricki's grave last Thursday, a month or so since my last visit. However, certain things cropped up, and I didn't manage, so I went today. (Even today I toyed with the idea of pushing the visit off another week or so, as I had other things I wanted to get done as well. However, I DID want to go, AND I felt as well an obligation to not put the visit off too long.)  As I was walking to her grave (it's only about a ten minute walk from the bus stop), I remembered that it's "mother's day".

    Now, I am not a big advocate of "mother's day", feeling that I need to tell my mom more than once a year that I appreciate her, and not, certainly, because someone reminded me. But with all that aside, I was struck by the irony that I was going to Ricki's grave exactly on "mother's day". 

   You see, I am still very much Ricki's mom. I think about her often, and the fact that she was my daughter is such a big part of my existence.Being a parent doesn't stop when our children grow up and move away, get married, and find jobs. We are still concerned about them--- and their families as well. We pray for them, we enjoy them,  and we sometimes even risk inserting our two cents of an opinion.

    And our offspring, in turn, often sweeten our lives by showing the  maturity that once we were never sure would take root and sprout. We see them raising their children, and interacting with their nephews, and we are touched by the similarities between this, and how they were raised, and grateful for those things they do better. 

    So happy mother's day to all you moms.... and let's try and be the moms we hope our kids will one day be. 

The Decision/Choices

   Today I saw this photo posted on the facebook page "Amber's Journey from 400 lbs to Healthy"

[image with caption: "Hey you, weight loss and a healthy life is not a fairytale. If you want it, get off your a** and work for it."]

   I LOVE it and HATE it. Why?

    I love it because it contains a very pertinent truth: Weight loss comes not from a magic Chinese tea, not from a fad diet, but from an honest-to-goodness evaluation of what is keeping you from living in a healthy way, and then making the choices that are needed to get there.

   I hate it because the forever-thin population is unlikely to know just how hard weight loss can be. I can see them smugly throwing this line to every obese person they know. And they may have no idea of just how difficult the journey can be.

     [ I have written previously on this topic HERE in a similar vein, including Jewish sources.]

    Thin people often think that the overweight person just has to "make up their mind" in order to lose the excess poundage. But in reality, true weight loss is not caused by a one-time decision, but by a 1001 choices, moment-by-moment, day-by-day. The slim population needs to realize that keeping that type of extended commitment to weight loss is an accomplishment akin to the success of a marathon runner: you only are going to achieve results with a consistent, sustained change in the way one views food and living.

   And those who are overweight need to  grasp that each individual choice is not that difficult. It is doable, and even enjoyable. If you take the journey step-by-step, you will arrive at your goal eventually.

   So to make life more fun, I have created two poster-pictures:

[image of trail sign with caption "Weight loss is not from a one-time decision. It's a series of choices, moment by moment, day by day."]

And:

[image with caption: "People who are thin don't know how hard weight-loss is. People who are overweight don't know how doable it is…..."]

Memorial Day in Israel

[This post was prompted by comments over at Shiloh Musings

 ]

   There has been a lot of debate in Israel lately about whether to keep "soldier's memorial day" back-to-back with Independence Day (preceding it) or not. Here are my thoughts on this:

1)      I do not think that we should combine, as some have suggested, Memorial Day with holocaust remembrance day. They are two entirely different things! [This is one reason I am appalled by how politicians try to cash in on holocaust remembrance day with plans for Israel today. Holocaust day should be reserved for mourning what we have lost.]

2)     If we remove soldier's remembrance memorial day to a whole week before Independence day, it will lose a lot of its significance and impact. The limitation that we cannot start independence celebrations till nightfall after the memorial day is a stark reminder that this independence came at a very heavy price.

3)      I dare say that for families who have lost a family member, they will carry it forward into the holiday in any case.

4)      What could be done is to make the last few hours of the memorial day more neutral. Ceremonies should be in the morning, and up to 2 or 3. Radio and TV should after those hours have programs which are not holiday, but with less emphasis on mourning. Shops should remain closed.

2 easy cute health hints for dieters with iphones

These things are really easy, and for the youngsters, they will laugh at me thinking that this is "news". But for the 60-year-olds like me, I just want to throw your way a few thoughts/ideas you may not have thought of...

1) accessible maps:
make a folder "health and maps" in your photos section. Move to there any screen captures of maps that you  use often when walking, route plans, and the like. Then you don't have to go through all the family pics when looking for the map

2)I always forget my target heart range, especially as there are various ways to computr it. So... :
1)Download a free heart rate  app (I use Azumio)
2)On awakening take resting pulse
3 ) go to:
   http://savvyhealthfitness.com/health-and-fitness-tools/heart-rate-zone-calculator
4) figure heart rate range
5) take screen shot
6) move photo to a "health, maps" folder of pics  (The ppint here is to make the picture easy to find and access)
NOW YOU HAVE An EASILY Accessible target heart rate chart 

 BTW, for those who say "download an app for target heart rate", I only saw 2 in app store. One has a much less accurate chart than the one on the "health and fitness" site; the second works with AVERAGE pulse. For someone with a slower-than-regular resting pulse rate (like me), the results would be way off

The Second Step

   The first step in losing weight is similar to the first step of Alcoholics Anonymous: The realization that I reached this point due to my choices, and the knowledge that I need to make some changes in my life.

   But the second step is OH so much harder!  And a lot of people never do this step, and (in my humble opinion) this is the main reason that they are not able to complete the job.

   Whoever overeats has a reason for doing so. We all want to be thin, beautiful, and healthy, so there must be a compelling reason that causes us to irrationally overeat. We are GAINING SOME BENEFIT FROM THE EXCESS FOOD. Possibilities:

-sugar gives me an energy boost when I didn't sleep enough last night…

-cake comforts my nerves when I am tense

-eating gives me something to do when bored

    These are just a few examples. The "second step" is to discover WHAT IS TRIGGERING your overeating, and find NON-FOOD ALTERNATIVES.

   Even though I am a good three years on this journey, and about 75 kilos (165 lbs) lighter, I still struggle at times with overeating. Because those "benefits" of overeating are still there, I still have to be on my toes to make sensible choices.  It is OH SO EASY to slip back to bad and unhealthy ways of dealing with tiredness and stress.

   However, on the positive side, it does become easier to make those right choices. I've learned, for example, that a good brisk walk will cure my tension even better than a cookie… and without the guilt, as well!

    And of course, making those right choices, and living healthy is a heck of a lot of fun……

Geocaching, Losing Weight, and Flexibility

   Today I went geocaching. For the first time in my life.
   A recent article on Spark People reminded me how my brother and son went geocaching together four years ago in Colorado. I was there, but hadn't joined them. Why not? Maybe because I was busy with something else. Maybe it was the sabbath (when I don't do this type of stuff...). Maybe because I had other plans. I really don't remember. But even if those had been a reason, the biggest reason would have been my weight.
   You see, when someone is very overweight, it is SSSOOO easy to get set in a grove of things that are comfortable, things you KNOW that you can do.... situations where you can be reasonably assured not to be laughed at, or spoken to in a condescending manner.
   Trying new things is scary....
-the amusement park?... I might not fit in the seat
-biking?... If I fall, can I get up? Is the bike strong enough?
-a new dance class?... maybe other people will roll their eyes, I'll be a failure at it...?

   One of the biggest gifts of my losing weight is the self assurance that I can try new things. And if I fail at something... well, everyone does, but since I am successful at MOST stuff, one small failure isn't the end

Geocaching; Losing Weight

   Today I did something fun—I went and found a geocache ! The fun was not the contents of the cache, but the challenge of finding it. And in addition, I discovered a few new small parks between a park I knew and a big park I had never WALKED to until today (but which I had gone to previously by bus), Park Wolfson. And then I turned around and walked home! (A total of  about 3 hours of walking, in addition to several errands beforehand.)

   The point here, though, is that I ENJOY walking. Climbing 50 steps to a park on a hill no longer, as it did once, make me gasp for breath. Once upon a time, even if I COULD do such a walk, I would have terrible leg pains afterwards. Today I put my legs up for 5 minutes after I got home, and felt fine.

   I doubt if people who have been very overweight for several years have a true idea of JUST how TREMENDOUS the changes in their life can be with weight loss. Let me share some of the changes I have experienced:

1)      My knees no longer hurt

2)      I can climb up the three flights of stairs to my house without stopping 2-3 times in the middle, and without feeling like I'm on the verge of a heart attack

3)      I can run to catch the "cross" light while green, before it turns to red.

4)      If I run out of onions, I pop over to the vegetable store, rather than waiting until someone comes home. And the 4 minute up and down the stairs and crossing the bit to the store in no big deal.

5)      I don't have to sew my own clothing, or go to a special store for super-big sizes. (Which charge super-big prices as well…)

6)      I can buy a bathing suit.

7)      I am no longer mortified by embarrassment when I go to the beach, pool, etc.

8)      I no longer cringe before every doctor's visit, knowing that I will be told that any problem I have will be blamed on me….

9)      I can dance and dance and dance at a wedding, and it is FUN…..

10)   Today I can use all sorts of standard things, which once were too small: seat belts, hospital gowns, bus seats, airline seats, etc etc

11)   Jewelry, watches, etc fit me.

12)   People see ME, not "My G-d, what a FAT lady!!"

13)   It is easy to pick stuff off the floor, clean under closets, climb unto chairs, climb ladders.

14)   If for some reason I am sitting on the floor, it does not take tremendous strategic maneuvers to rise.

15)   My legs (veins) no longer hurt. My cholesterol returned to normal, as did my blood pressure.

16)   I have more energy—MUCH more

In addition, I have gained the self confidence that I can accomplish my goals, even if I occasionally make a small slip. I no longer have to be "perfect" in everything, to compensate for my over-weight "deficiency".

Not a bad trade, huh, for those 75 kilos…….

   

The Big Wave

   It is currently one of the intermediate days of the Passover holiday. After a month (more or less) of cleaning, and a few days of holiday cooking, families are out enjoying the spring weather. So instead of curling up with a book (my typical chol haMoed treat) I went walking in park of the Yarkon and along the coast (only 2 1/2 hours, from Bnai Brak to Sheraton hotel). I've been looking forward to this walk the entire last month, when I haven't had the free time to do it. On reaching the Mediterranean I saw that it was very wavy, wetting the boardwalk in a few places. That was fun to watch....

   After reaching the ocean, I walked a bit (about a half hour) along the sea-side boardwalk. At one point however, it is usually very crowded (especially on "festive" days, like today. Not wanting to mess up my aerobic step count, I elected to walk the section of the sidewalk closer to the ocean - yes I could see that it was wet, but so what if I happen to catch a big wave? So my feet will get a bit wet??? Well I caught a big wave alright- and got DRENCHED head to foot.! [So drenched that I was still wet when I arrived home an hour later. (I returned by way of public transportation.)]  I also managed to do a bit of "mini exploring" in the public garden next to the Sheraton hotel, finding a lovely view of the ocean. 

[image: view of Mediterranean Ocean]

[image: view of Tel Aviv beachfront and Marina, with Jaffa in the distance.]

From there one can also see Jaffa in the distance:

Pre-Passover Update

   Yes, I know I have gone AWOL, not blogging for nearly 2 weeks (and not reading blogs of others, either, for those who are used to my "inciteful" comments…).  I am deep in the preparations for the upcoming Passover holiday, and if I have any spare time, I'd rather get out to do some walking. So how am I doing with my resolutions from two weeks ago? (previous post)?

1)      I did NOT buy eating chocolate at the supermarket, and not having the luscious swiss chocolate around helps a LOT.

2)      In previous years I usually obtained only 4 hours of sleep a night before Passover. This year I am getting 6 hours most nights (and sometimes even more), and never less than 5. Not ideal, but at least an improvement!

3)        Most days I am getting my exercise in. Sometimes, like yesterday, it takes a bit of planning. Yesterday I had errands to run:

-        To the fish store (2 minutes away)

-        To Ricki's old school to give them some study materials I had purchased for her) (10 minutes away, 8 from the fish store)

-        To buy some nuts (12 minutes away, 10 from the fish store)

-        To the health fund building to give them a paper (because their fax hasn't been working for 5 days already!) (17 minutes from home in a different direction)

-        To pay a small debt for my husband (10 minutes away in a third direction).

-        To buy morning groceries at the small grocery next door.

NORMALLY I would go to the fish store, the school, the nut store, then a long walk to the health fund, and then way over to pay the debt. And finally, I would stop at the grocery. HOWEVER, that plan would make my initial stretch have no ten-minute aerobic intervals. So instead I rearranged everything. I went to the fish store, then a ten minute jaunt to the nut store, and trailed back the smidgen to the school. Then I went to the health fund, returned to the grocery (having them deliver my stuff), and finally over to pay the debt. This way I got in over an hour's worth of aerobic exercise in without costing me any time! (GRIN)

[image: hand Matzo]

This morning I sat down to figure how many calories "layil Seder" (Seder night, the meal of Matzah and wine eaten on the first night of Passover) will "cost" me:

Hand Matzah  - 5 gezaisim (portions)–equal to about 6  machine matzahs (6 X120)= 720

4  kosot ("4 cups", half wine half grape juice , 150 cc each(

           Grape j. 300cc X 105 per 100 cc= 315

           Semi dry wine 3 X 125 per 100 cc wine= 375                                           690

1/2  hard-boiled egg (no way I will eat a whole one)                                               40

Fish , smallish portion                                                                                            150

lettuce, chrain ( horseradish with beets), BIT mayonnaise

 (1t. dabbed on fish)and a pickle                                                                           100                                                                                                                                              

Chicken                                                                                                                200

Vegies                                                                                                                    50

NO desert ("afikomen" matzah, included above in matzah is "desert")

TOTAL:                                                                                                            1250

   And I will NOT feel guilty if I go over my calorie range for the day. ("IF?!?!" Is there a question?) I will enjoy the holiday. (But seeing this will remind me to try and keep the calorie count down earlier that day!)

   And for all of you who ARE "making Pesach" (preparing for Passover) (as if any of those have time to read this…), ENJOY!!

Redemption

     The bathroom scales show a significant loss this week. But before you start applauding, keep in mind that the majority of that loss is the quick shedding of the extra weight I packed on over the Purim holiday (see previous post) nashing (snacking) on cake and other types of extraneous and unneeded stuff. The good news is that I am at the lowest that I have been for the last several months. (About four months ago I managed to reach about a half kilo less than today.)

    However, I am wary to celebrate, as Pesach (Passover) is on the horizon, as well as the hectic weeks leading up to the holiday. Now I LOVE Passover, and don't even mind the house-cleaning which precedes it.  But if Purim has traditionally been a downfall for me (see previous post), Pesach, and the weeks leading up to it have even more so.

   For any of you who do not know, the pre-Passover period, for the Jewish housewife is a marathon. Passover cleaning CAN be done easily, but most of us take the chance to spring clean while getting rid of all the leaven we own. And that getting rid of the leaven makes it much more than spring cleaning.  After cleaning our house, we need to store away our regular dishes, cover all counter tops, and get out the Passover dishes. And while doing this, we need to feed our families without the benefit of kitchen facilities. (For example, imagine making a salad where to rinse each vegetable you need to run to the other side of the house to a water source.) And if you are overworked and tired, the temptation to reach into a cupboard for some luscious Passover chocolate (read "easy instant energy fix") can be pretty great. Then, you start cooking holiday meals, hopefully festive ones, which generally are NOT that low in calories. So it is no surprise that each year I gain over Passover, and I am skeptical of my ability to withstand the temptations that are impending.

   And, as I indicated in the previous post, wishful thinking about "doing better this year" is just not enough. If I want to emerge on the other side of March without a gain, I need to take some concrete action. Here's my plan:

1)      I will buy the chocolate for cooking (and the grandkids) ONLY after the kitchen is ready for Passover and fully functional. When I am able to cook up a pot of vegetable soup, the lure of the sweet "fix" should be more manageable. Yes, it will cost more in the local grocery than the supermarket, but that's OK. (And if my husband insists on having the tan temptation, he will have to buy and hide for himself.)

2)      Plan menus which are easier and less time consuming for the holiday. There is no need to cook gourmet that leftovers are "a pity" to dispose of. There are lots of pretty, healthy, and easy menus out there.

3)      Work on getting at least 6 hours of sleep a night. Even if that means less spring cleaning and less time online.

4)      Try to maintain a minimum of "walking" (exercise) time (even if only half an hour). I know that walking not only keeps my metabolism going, but it decreases my appetite, and busts away stress.

  And then, for the holiday of redemption, I hope to celebrate redemption from my former bad eating habits.

Changing My Role

    Yesterday the Non-Jewish world was preoccupied with the Oscars. To the Jewish world, it was Purim, a day of feasting and sending gifts of food to friends and neighbors.

   Like every other holiday in the world, people have taken Purim and cellophane wrapped it, commercializing it way beyond where we should have allowed. Certain aspects (sending food gifts and allowing moderate drinking) have been emphasized, while others, like giving gifts to the poor, take a poor second place in our attention. And two groups of people tend to view Purim with a bit of fear: those hoping to not gain weight, and families of alcoholics.

      There is a religious obligation to imbibe wine on Purim (except, as many Rabbis have ruled, there are physical or mental health problems involved, which would include nearly every alcoholic). Not surprisingly, any alcoholic person who is not serious about changing his ways will use Purim as an excuse to drink to excess. And this can often deal a very "unfair" tone and pall to that which is a favorite holiday to the rest of the community.

     The other group that uses Purim as an excuse to indulge an addiction is the "food addict".  Just as the alcoholic faces wine on the table, the overeater faces plates of home-baked pastries and chocolates. Ideally, we should be sending (as I do) salads and fish, and receiving the same (I wish!).

      I tried to not over-indulge in the cakes on Purim, and I failed. Not totally, but enough that I am still wondering what type of craziness entered my brain. But at least that failure was partial, and as long as I return to my eating plan immediately, has (and had) no negative impact on my family. Unfortunately, the same cannot be said about the alcoholic, and a guest at our Purim meal managed to effectively wreck the whole celebration as we tried to limit their drinking, shouting, and vulgar talk. And my emotional reaction to this situation was undoubtedly a big part of "the craziness that entered my brain". (Which may explain it, but not excuse it.)

  All of this highlights for me the inevitable connection between addictive overeating and emotions. Which means that simply resolving to "be careful", "do it smart this year", etc., just isn't going to do the trick. This means that if a "Purim Binge" on petit-fours is not to be a yearly disaster, I need to make a better action plan than simple resolutions.

    I definitely need to change my role, and if I do, the Oscars will have nothing on me!

Sleep

I need to work on getting enough sleep. Up until now I have realized intellectually that I need more sleep, that it is not heart- healthy, and is a major trigger to overeating. However I have been  loathe to give up the activities that are keeping me up late at night.

   So today I read on Spark people a few articles on sleep, and here are a few additional gems:

1)      In fact, if you’re sleep-deprived you’re likely to have higher concentrations of sugar in your blood, which could contribute to development of a pre-diabetic condition.

2)      Sleep is instrumental to good health and even weight loss. A disruption in your hormones and your different metabolic processes has all kinds of adverse effects. Your fat cells respond to the food you eat differently, based on your hormones. Sleep loss affects the level of certain hormones, putting your body in a position to gain weight.

3)      Sleep is also important in developing lean muscle tissue. When you work out, you are actually tearing your muscle – sleep and proper nutrients help re-build the muscle.  [ie, lack of sleep may be why I am not seeing so much difference in my muscles, even though I am doing toning exercises]

OK- so I DO need more shut-eye…..now I need to try and think of a plan to do it, to deal with the activities that are keeping me up….

"The Best" vs. "My Best"

   Today I only did 55 minutes for LCW ("Last Chance Workout" for a Biggest Loser Competition group on SPARK site). Normally I do much more, often 2 hours or more. And believe me, the will to do my normal output was there. I love walking, and the idea of a nice aerobic hike in the Yarkon park today, a lovely sunny day, was very enticing.

   However, there were other considerations at play. Passover is nearing, and I have a long list of things I hope to get done this week. Chief among them is going through Ricki's old study materials, and deciding what to give to friends, what to family, etc. And while the job needs to get done, it is much less alluring than a brisk walk. So the thought "I'll walk and THEN get to work" dogged me. Because, you must understand, my online group was counting on me. And I would LOVE to earn the accolade of logging in maximum points…….

   Often we feel a pull between what we need to do, and something conflicting, which we prefer doing. At these times we need to examine what are we really choosing. And not only which actions, but the ramifications of that choice. Here the choice was this:

1)      Either go walking, getting good vibes from fellow on-line team members ("The Best"). The ramifications of this choice is that I will not get the cleaning done, or all of it, leading to more pressure and probably less sleep in a week or two.

2)      or clean, and be "MY best". The ramification is not doing my best for the on-line group.

   Once I not only looked at the actions, but at the ramifications of the choice, it was easy for me to choose.

   So, dear online group members, I only did 55 minutes of walking today. But I'm not going to say "I'm sorry", because I'm not. I'll just say "I wish I could have done both".

Keeping Kosher Away from Home

   I've travelled abroad several times in recent years, and keeping kosher away from home can be a challenge, more in some places than others. The Blog Me-Ander touches on the need for "real food", when one is traveling, and she is right! I remember seeing an apple in an airport eatery once, and grabbing the chance to purchase some REAL food!

Here are my ideas:

Before traveling, look up online for as much information as you can, and email kosher stores to try and determine if they still exist, and the products they carry. Determine which chesherim (kosher certifications) are commonly used in that area, and choose those which you are willing to use. In addition, the phone number of a local Rabbi if there is one (or from the nearest large city) is invaluable.

   In addition, check the customs laws for the country you are traveling to, and in they allow you to bring in salami, breads, etc. I have generally found getting kosher bread and meat (and chalav Yisroel for those who are stringent) more problematic than other products. But, for example, in Brazil the "kosher store" carried mostly tuna, meat, and sweets.

   However, there are MANY things you can do or buy to make keeping kosher easier:

A.     Pack in your CHECKED baggage a cutting board and a small knife. With these you can easily make salads and prepare fresh fruit. If taking a salami, take along an extra set of boards/knives for that. This last trip I took very thin plastic cutting boards which were basically weightless.

B.     Be sure to carry some REAL non-liquid food into your carry-on luggage, especially since sometimes ordered "kosher meals" don't arrive to a flight. (Or in one flight, they served a "milky" meal 4 hours after a meaty one.) Even if the kosher meal arrives, it is usually rather unhealthy fare… Good food for carry ones are:

-        "Mana hamah"

-        fresh sandwiches (yellow cheese keeps well)

-        pitot with a small (under 100 ml)(unopened) can of tuna

-        a fruit or two.  Cucumbers and carrot sticks are good too. (The fruit and vegetables you will want to finish before your arrival.)

-        Good high-energy foods are raisins and nuts

C.     Good foods for after your arrival:

1)      -Packages of tortillas (stay fresh until opened, make a great wrap for tuna fish and salads), and for soya products

2)      a WHOLE salami, unopened, the kind that does not need refrigeration until being    opened (It might be problematic bringing into the US. In Brazil, no problem….)

3)      packaged rice that can be cooked in an oven (double wrapping it in foil) or (if your Rav allows, in plastic in a microwave).

4)      vacum-packed "swarmah" soya (needs no refrigeration until opened)

Eulogy for Moni (my MIL)

Moni was regal.

     I know that when I say this, no one who knows Monil be surprised… we all know that Moni had class.  She had the tremendous ability to impart unto others her ideas and visions, without losing sight of who she was speaking to. She spoke to you with such a tone as to let you understand that she understood you, but expected certain things as well.

   In addition, Moni was generous and loving. Maybe that's why she was so compelling… we knew that her requests were always based not only on her clear sense of justice, but her love as well.

   Moni, today you leave this complicated world, going to a place much clearer and simpler. May you go in peace, finally joining your husband. You leave us, missed by so many, cherished by so many children and grandchildren (and great grandchildren). And those who had the privilege of knowing you will never forget that powerhouse called "Moni".

   I am so grateful that Sammy and I managed to come to see you; I feel that you deserved no less. I wish I could give you a final chug, to whisper in your ear how much I admire you. And may we all learn from Moni to act with determination, with class, with love.