I was talking to a friend about our family news. Some was about some of my sons, who are not "religious", as is standard in our neighborhood.
"But you are beyond caring what others will think, aren't you?"
And, I had to admit, that I pretty much am, at least as regards my sons and my husband. But when my own short-failings come into view (ie., about my overweight), it is a different matter.
Take the other day. It was about noon and I was out running errands. I was hot, and made my way over to a small drinks vender, intending to buy as diet coke. Then I noticed that they had diet (39 calorie) ice cream bars. I bought it. But as I unwrapped it, I planned to hold the paper wrapping in my hand until I finished. Thus, MAYBE, passersby would notice that it was dietetic. Imagine if you see someone extremely overweight eating an ice cream bar, Most people would assume that they just don't care, are not trying, are irresponsible, etc. I don't want to be judged like that.
Then I grinned and threw the paper in the trash.
"You swollen-head egotist" I berated myself, "Do you really think that ANYONE passing by gives a HOOT about what you are eating, and thinks about it?!??? You are so self-conceited; you are lucky that THAT isn't as visible as the fat!"