Recently I read a post about acceptance of our children and their intellectual disability. A commenter mentioned that his parents truly “accepted” his sister (who has Down syndrome), and the example he gave was their non-chalance about her “belting” out a song in a restaurant.
Quite frankly, I was upset by the assumption that acceptance means letting your child act inappropriately.
I am happy with my daughter and have no trouble with her disability (well, almost no trouble; let’s be honest….). However, not withstanding that acceptance, I wouldn't let her belt out a song in a restaurant. People are paying money for a nice evening need not be accosted with noise. IF a child does something off the wall, has a meltdown. etc, yes, other patrons should understand. But to encourage behavior that is disturbing others is no big mitzvah (good deed) in my eyes. I would not tolerate such behavior from my other children, why should I tolerate it in Ricki? If I would, am I not sending her a message that she is less responsible for her actions, and less capable of controlling them than my other children?
What do YOU think?