In the Talmud Rabbi Yehuda said:
“In the
Time-to-Come, The Holy One, Blessed is He (G-d) will bring the yetzer
hara (evil inclination) and slaughter him before the righteous and the
evil. To the righteous it will appear like a high mountain, and to the evil it
will appear like a thread of hair. Both will cry; the righteous will cry and
say, “How were we able to overcome this high mountain?” The evil will cry and
say, “How were we not be able to overcome this thread of hair?” (Succah
52a)
So
is it big or small? How can it be both? Whose perception is correct?
Actually, both. It’s like this (and I am
examining this from the view of working on diet and exercise, but you can take
this to any bad habit you need to work on…):
People who are
severely overweight tend to believe that their overeating is beyond control. I
remember at one diet group that I attended years ago (which was not successful for
me), one woman moaned “But this is a full-life ‘prison sentence’!”
The presenter said
no, that after one loses weight, they will not need to strictly diet. But in
reality she missed the point completely. (No wonder her group didn’t work….)
Any changes in
lifestyle needed to lose weight will need to be continued, at least in a milder
form, for one’s entire life (if you want to keep that weight off). BUT
THAT IS NOT PRISON!!! Prison is the enslavement we endure to
food, the feeling that we can not break free from overeating, and the
limitations that overweight places on us! And even more importantly, the
presenter needed to inform her clients that if the work on making correct
choices, they will acclimate to the new way of life. Gradually they will come
to ENJOY their healthier lifestyle, even with the new limitations which seem so
constricting at first glance. Even if you are used to eating a huge plateful of
pasta for lunch, and a regular-sized serving seems miniscule, it will not appear
that way forever. Each correct choice you make strengthens your resolve,
creates new habits and expectations. Your psyche and body become accustomed to
the new reality. There comes a day when you really prefer a nice salad (most
days, at least) to an overly sweet cream
cake that is simply too rich for your newly developed taste buds.
So let’s return to
that Gemorah (Talmud passage) quoted above. The person who did not conquer his
desires thinks that he has an insurmountable urge. But in reality, it is not
so. The “dieter” needs to take things day-by-day, one moment at a time. He will
find that each single instance of resisting his desires is not that hard, as
long as he is determined to change his past patterns. (For example, fasting on
Yom Kipper is not harder for the overweight person than the thin, as he
understands with certainty that he can not eat.) One becomes habituated to
being able to (generally) resist. He discovers that being in control of what he
does is empowering. Liberating.
And when all is said
and done, G-d will show him that bit by bit, moment by moment (hair-by-hair), he climbed a
full mountain!
[Hmmm... maybe I should apply this to my habit of under-sleeping as well as overeating,..........]
(Thanks to Susan
Barnes, whose post “How to Slaughter a Demon” prompted me to go ahead and write
a post I have been toying around with for a while…. But if you follow the link,
read the whole thing, don’t stop after just reading how to slaughter the demon….)
1 comment:
I completely agree with everything you have said here. Years ago my mom was extremely overweight and then she went through PRISM which is a Christian program many churches advertised during that time. What she learned and thus, what I learned from watching her, is that changing a habitual problems is a lifestyle change. We can't just try eating healthy for a few months then go back to eating whatever we feel like.
Along those same lines, I used to be slightly overweight as well - until I got pregnant. I actually lost a lot of weight during my first trimester and after that my food cravings were the opposite of what I had been eating. Since then - it's been about 4 years - I have been very careful not to overindulge because I DO NOT want to go back to eating a bag of potato chips by myself in one day.
All this to say, I enjoyed this post and agree with all that you said! Thank you!
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